When my girlfriend wanted spanking into our sexual experiences, I’ll admit – I was taken aback. The idea of spanking had never crossed my mind before, and her request left me feeling a mix of confusion and guilt. I wondered if there was something wrong with me for feeling uncomfortable with the idea, or if this was a normal aspect of sexual exploration.
As I delved deeper into the topic, I discovered that my initial reaction was completely natural. While every relationship is unique, many individuals share similar hesitations when it comes to introducing any form of pain, even if it’s mild, into our intimate moments. It’s important for me to remember that exploring new sexual desires and boundaries is a personal journey, and it’s completely okay for me to feel unsure or conflicted about certain requests.
This blog post aims to provide guidance and support for anyone who has been asked to incorporate spanking into their sexual encounters and isn’t sure how to respond. By addressing common concerns, such as understanding the appeal of spanking, navigating feelings of guilt, ensuring consent, and fostering open communication, we can enhance our intimate connections and create a safe and pleasurable experience for both partners. So, let’s dive deeper into this topic and explore the intricacies of incorporating spanking into a consensual and fulfilling sexual relationship.
Why Do I Enjoy When My Girlfriend Wanted Spanking?
Before addressing any feelings of guilt, it helps me to understand my own motivations for wanting a spanking. There are various factors that contribute to the appeal for me:
- Arousal: Being spanked causes an adrenaline rush for me, quickly arousing me through the intensity of the sensation. The element of risk or taboo also adds an exciting element to my experience.
- Power Exchange: The act of spanking allows me to comfortably hand over sexual power to my partner. This submission fuels the intensity of the experience for both of us, adding a dynamic element to our relationship.
- Fun and Adventure: For my partner and me, a light spanking offers thrill and escape from the everyday. It can be an adventurous mode of foreplay, introducing excitement and variety into our sexual encounters.
- Personal Reasons: It’s important to note that personal reasons for enjoying spanking can vary greatly. Each individual may have their own unique motivations and preferences when it comes to their sexual desires and fantasies.
It’s also crucial to address the concern of whether spanking is demeaning to women. While this may be an initial gut reaction for some, it’s important to consider that when a practice occurs between consenting adults within reasonable limits, judgments around whether it’s right or wrong often reflect personal values more than ethical absolutes.
In the context of an otherwise caring and equal relationship, a requested spanking likely indicates simply a preference for specific bedroom play, rather than any underlying demeaning intentions. Mutual fulfillment and respect remain the priority, ensuring that both partners feel comfortable and satisfied in our intimate experiences.
Do I Feel Guilt After Spanking?
I have some common concerns around spanking guilt. While my motivations for spanking are deeply personal, there are several worries that give me pause:
One concern is the fear of hurting my partner. I understand that establishing boundaries is essential, and we can agree upon signals like a safe word to indicate when to slow down or stop. It’s also important to discuss aftercare, such as gentle touch, blankets, and check-ins, to ensure that my partner feels emotionally supported afterwards.
I also sometimes worry about cultural taboos surrounding spanking. Ingrained social norms may suggest that only “deviants” would enjoy something like spanking. However, I believe that between compatible partners, these sexual discoveries simply expand intimacy. Remaining judgment-free helps relieve any guilt I may feel.
Another concern is the power imbalance in the relationship. I sometimes worry that striking my partner could seem to betray my caretaking instincts, even when consent is given. However, I believe that ongoing communication and attentiveness can help navigate this concern. It’s important to reassure my partner that I want the experience to meet their needs too.
Navigating consent is another concern of mine. I understand that sexual compatibility requires respecting each partner’s needs. Guilt around crossing unseen lines is understandable, which is why I believe that consent should be voluntary, informed, and reversible. My partner must want this without coercion, and I assure them that there is no obligation to continue if they change their mind. I am open to discussing exact specifics and welcome all their questions.
When it comes to trying new things, I believe that taking things slowly can ease any discomfort. Baby steps can build confidence and prevent overwhelm. I can start by exploring gentle touch like sensuous scratching or grabbing before moving on to mild spanks. Starting slowly and checking in frequently allows my partner to gauge their sensations and desires. If my partner desires more intensity over time, we can gradually increase it over multiple encounters.
If I ever have concerns or patterns that warrant assessment, such as nonconsensual hitting, compulsion, or relationship issues, I understand the importance of seeking help and pressing pause to re-evaluate. In summary, I believe that open communication, consent, and mutual respect are crucial when exploring spanking in a relationship. In these cases, I would seek help in processing my underlying motivations, establishing healthy boundaries, and realigning my intimacy needs. An LGBTQ+/kink-aware relationship therapist can offer guidance specific to navigating my sexual expression.
Conclusion:
Experimenting with adventurous yet consensual sexual play like spanking allows my partner and me to expand both our erotic and emotional intimacy. But for me as the receiver’s partner, I feel discomfort around inflicting any form of pain and I try to approach it with empathy.
Still, my interest in being spanked generally signals my fun sexual openness rather than emotional troubles or relationship power gaps. Through ongoing attentiveness, tuning into each other’s subtle cues and responses, we can thoughtfully traverse new territory together, keeping our communication active.
Over time, any leftover feelings of guilt tend to evolve into assurance as our mutual fulfillment remains a priority through every adventurous encounter. So, we take things slowly, check in often, and let her pleasure cues guide us as we both playfully expand our sexual boundaries.
You can find more information about real spanking story by reading our What Was Hudson’s Unforgettable Hardest Spanking In Childhood?
